Teacher of the Year by Joe David

School principal to finance costume balls For teaching staff with a federal grant ____
WASHINGTON, DC – Dr. Pepe/Pepita Noriega, Horace Mann High School’s Latin-bombshell-transvestite school principal, announced last night at a faculty costume ball at the Edmund Burke Hotel that s/he will continue to use federal money to sponsor cotillions to fight teacher burnout. “Nothing improves morale quicker than a gala event,” Noriega told reporters. “That’s why I insist we have at least one each semester.” Dressed elegantly in a sequined gown, the respected Horace Mann High School principal has been startling the education community by devising innovative techniques for reducing teacher burnout. In a campaign to fight teacher lethargy and bring freshness and new energy into the classroom, s/he has vowed to use the money from a $5 million Federal grant, not on books and computers for the students as several school board members recommended, but on gala costume balls and other forms of entertainment for the teachers. The former college-football-lineman turned transvestite believes “it is time to end teacher burnout once and for all. The best way to do this,” s/he said, “is to give teachers something to look forward to – like a costume ball, in which they can dress as their favorite movie star.” Pepe/Pepita Noriega is a fictitious characters in Joe David’s outrageously funny satire, Teacher of the Year. Reviewers have referred to the book as “unique fun, startling” (Jennifer Stephens, WXCD-FM); “a good read” (Bob Madigan, WTOP-Washington); “a madcap, often twistedly comic satire” (Sam Weller, New City Newspaper, Chicago); and “wonderfully humorous...with serious messages about teaching and education” (Mike Bowler, Baltimore Sun).